"Whoooooo!" - Random Drunk White Guy Walking Down Street in Adams Morgan Drinkin'.


Yes, I do it.

Sometimes, when I'm feeling "hood" I might just whip out a Black and Mild.
HA!

Now what!

However, I have noticed that things White Folk do while drunk differ from OUR (As A People) kind of "things".

I'm not saying we're better (Who am I kidding? We are!) but let's compared shall we:

White Guy Drunk Will:

Shout for no reason
Pull stunt on camera
Moon people in cars
Drink till passed out
Scream for no reason
Hug random people
Kiss and make out with whomever is around with breasts
Yell "Whoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!"
Tell some Black guy he is cool with that, "He thinks Black people are cool!"
Will dance badly (sober or not)
Gets extra hostile in certain situations
Turns red
Will beg DJ to play AC/DC - "You Shook Me All Night Long" or some rock song from the late 80's
Will riot like hell (turning over cars, trampling people,burning stuff, etc.)

Black Man Drunk Will -
Act a damn fool
Be quiet
Get really hype
Get horny
Get the courage to hollar at a woman in the club, get turned down, and say, "Fuck You then Bitch!"
Lose ability to control the "poke factor", while dancing with a woman
Start a fight
Lose ability to act like a sane individual when anything by Lil'Jon or 3-6 Mafia comes on
Be violent and horny at same time
Get in the corner at the bar or club and stay quiet cause he needs to "think"
Pee anywhere, i.e: in public
Call his girl or his momma cause he "misses them"
Stumble and trip over own feet (I have not seen a drunk brotha fall yet)
Have shit pop off in group settings, i.e: club (which is the major downfall)

Anyone have any other ideas?
Please post comments. Thanks!  ¶ 1:18 PM